Is there a certain look

[chillddreamer]

I was wondering if there are certain signs what some one wears, the kind of accessories, that people carry or don't carry that gives sign what your sexual orintation is or is that just a myth. Can some one please help me with this, I would be very thankful :cool:

[Mayalaen]

There must be something that gives us away as just yesterday a friend asked me flat out if I was bi and said she had known it for a while. I asked her if I gave off major vibes and she said no but there must be enough that she was able to get it. I'm cautious in daily life not to come across as anything but straight so I don't know what happened there.

[gayle]

If there is some "dress code" one uses to signal to others that they are straight, bi, gay or lesbian, I am unaware of it. I have heard that some places people wear certain color bandanna's in order to cue others into their sexual orientation.
There is a lot written on this subject under a thread on this site entitled "Do You Look Queer" that you might want to read.
Some people seem to be more intuned with the sexuality of those around them. They seem to possess what we have referred to as "gaydar" or "bidar." I know that in certain settings, I seem to be able to pick up on the orientation of others, but if I'm walking through Wal-Mart, I am absolutely clueless. I'm not quite sure what it is that I am "picking up on" when I am able to correctly determine someone's sexual orientation. Perhaps I am noticing subtle cues such as a person's body language, or maybe it's just a sort of intuition. Sometimes a woman will look at me just a moment too long or lean in a little too close to me when she doesn't really know me well. Sometimes it is just the subtlest of things that cue me in to orientation. A person's style of dress doesn't seem to affect my impressions of their orientation.
If you do figure out a "dress code" for bi/straight/gay/lesbian, it would be fascinating to see it. I'm sure as soon as someone proposed such a dress code, it would immediately begin to change.

[teraspecter]

I think you guys are all missing the question here. Every now and then I'll here something about wearing a certain type of ring on a certain finger or something of that nature to secretly cue people in on your sexual preferences. It's been my experience, however, that this is more of a common practice when dealing with people who worry about discretion, which ultimately mean that they're ashamed of what they do, and I try to stay away from those types of activities now-a-days. If people are ashamed then its probably something I shouldnt be getting involved with. Here are a few I've heard, though (and not all are necessarily clues to orientation)


Wearing a gold ring on your thumb means you're a bisexual girl looking for fun.

These are probably the type of girls who are mostly looking for hookups or random girls to join her and her man in the bedroom and nothing more.


Having long professionally done nails painted black means you're into hooking up with black men.

These are the types that meet black men online to hookup with them because they can't get enough bbc (big black cock). Sometimes these types are into cuckolding as well (making their husbands go down on the black men, making them eat their cum out of her, etc...)


[I]Wearing a band-aid on your pinky means you're a swinger./I]

I've heard this one and others like it in the context of swinger's parties. If those organizing it would like to start it in a public place, this is often a signal to let them know who's into the scene and who isn't.

[chillddreamer]

There must be something that gives us away as just yesterday a friend asked me flat out if I was bi and said she had known it for a while. I asked her if I gave off major vibes and she said no but there must be enough that she was able to get it. I'm cautious in daily life not to come across as anything but straight so I don't know what happened there.

Ok thank for the reply I was just wondering. :cool:

[chillddreamer]

If there is some "dress code" one uses to signal to others that they are straight, bi, gay or lesbian, I am unaware of it. I have heard that some places people wear certain color bandanna's in order to cue others into their sexual orientation.
There is a lot written on this subject under a thread on this site entitled "Do You Look Queer" that you might want to read.
Some people seem to be more intuned with the sexuality of those around them. They seem to possess what we have referred to as "gaydar" or "bidar." I know that in certain settings, I seem to be able to pick up on the orientation of others, but if I'm walking through Wal-Mart, I am absolutely clueless. I'm not quite sure what it is that I am "picking up on" when I am able to correctly determine someone's sexual orientation. Perhaps I am noticing subtle cues such as a person's body language, or maybe it's just a sort of intuition. Sometimes a woman will look at me just a moment too long or lean in a little too close to me when she doesn't really know me well. Sometimes it is just the subtlest of things that cue me in to orientation. A person's style of dress doesn't seem to affect my impressions of their orientation.
If you do figure out a "dress code" for bi/straight/gay/lesbian, it would be fascinating to see it. I'm sure as soon as someone proposed such a dress code, it would immediately begin to change.

I read that post and that is how I came up with the question I was looking for more opinions I guess so I thought I could find out what people were thinking thanks. :cool:

[chillddreamer]

I think you guys are all missing the question here. Every now and then I'll here something about wearing a certain type of ring on a certain finger or something of that nature to secretly cue people in on your sexual preferences. It's been my experience, however, that this is more of a common practice when dealing with people who worry about discretion, which ultimately mean that they're ashamed of what they do, and I try to stay away from those types of activities now-a-days. If people are ashamed then its probably something I shouldnt be getting involved with. Here are a few I've heard, though (and not all are necessarily clues to orientation)


Wearing a gold ring on your thumb means you're a bisexual girl looking for fun.

These are probably the type of girls who are mostly looking for hookups or random girls to join her and her man in the bedroom and nothing more.


Having long professionally done nails painted black means you're into hooking up with black men.

These are the types that meet black men online to hookup with them because they can't get enough bbc (big black cock). Sometimes these types are into cuckolding as well (making their husbands go down on the black men, making them eat their cum out of her, etc...)


[I]Wearing a band-aid on your pinky means you're a swinger./I]

I've heard this one and others like it in the context of swinger's parties. If those organizing it would like to start it in a public place, this is often a signal to let them know who's into the scene and who isn't.


I thank you for the answers. I don't think that people are ashamed of who they are but there are expectations of other people they try to live up to. I am not ashamed but my family has always been very important to me and I can't stand the thought of them disowning me and my child because of my sexual orientation and that is the kind of family, my family has always been. But I also am aware that I will come clean soon. :cool:

[gayle]

There is one supposed cue to whether or not a man is gay or not. If he has his right ear pierced and wears an earring IN THAT EAR ONLY, he is gay. If he has his left ear pierced and wears the earring (or earrings) in that ear, then he is straight. If he wears earrings in both ears, there apparently is no meaning attached to it. I am told the rule is "Left (ear pierced) is right (straight) and right (ear pierced) is wrong (gay)." My bf has both ears double pierced but if he's wearing earrings, he usually wears them only in his left ear.

[chillddreamer]

There is one supposed cue to whether or not a man is gay or not. If he has his right ear pierced and wears an earring IN THAT EAR ONLY, he is gay. If he has his left ear pierced and wears the earring (or earrings) in that ear, then he is straight. If he wears earrings in both ears, there apparently is no meaning attached to it. I am told the rule is "Left (ear pierced) is right (straight) and right (ear pierced) is wrong (gay)." My bf has both ears double pierced but if he's wearing earrings, he usually wears them only in his left ear.

Thank you again I have a friend who is gay and he has both ears pierced and he wears earring in both. I have heard stuff about ears being pierced since I was a litle tyke and really didn't have a clue what they were talking about then. But maybe I should have guess that there are looks to everything and what they mean is what you make them mean.

But as every one knows I am bi curious and am wondering if I am sending of signal by carring or not carring certain accessories. For instance I don't carry a purse I just find them to bother some and clumsy. I guess that is the main wonder I hope that makes since let me know. :cool:

[CherryBlossom74]

There are Bi-Pride bracelets, anklets, necklaces and things of that nature you can buy. That will clue people in I guess. I wear an anklet and a bracelet to express. My lover wears the same plus a toe ring with the Bi-Pride colors when she wears sandals.

And I am proud to say we made the bracelets together. :bigrin: So perhaps this is an accessory you want to make or buy?

We're even looking for matching Bi-Pride navel rings for us, since we both consider our navel piercings as our "Coming Out/Coming Together" symbol to the world. Problem is the don't make them in our gauge...12. :(

[chillddreamer]

Thank you for input I would be trilled if you have any more :cool:

[CherryBlossom74]

Thank you for input I would be trilled if you have any more :cool:

Anymore what? Input or bracelets? We have the ability to make them when needed, since we purchased large quantities of materials to do so. On another webpage where Sean works, the kids there are in a state of hiding their sexual identity from ne another. So he set up a Sexual Identity thread for them to post n, if they wished. He posted his story and everyone who was Bisexual or Gay was heartened enough to come out of the closet online. Keep in mind these are most 14-21 year olds. As a sign of "You're not Alone" we made them Bi-Pride bracelets in their size and maile dthem to the people...free of charge.

[chillddreamer]

I was meaning input I love reading what people think and their ideas. That was so kind of you to send those braclets to the young people. I was just trying to sau if youany more please let me know thank you again :cool: